When To Fire Someone: 5 Strategies To Stop Being A Push-Over At Work
One of the hardest things a manager can do is fire someone.
I'll never forget the first time I had to fire someone. Leading up to the day, I could barely sleep. My heart was beating out of my chest, my palms were sweaty, my voice felt shaky. It was one of the hardest things I had ever had to do.
Since then, I've had to do it many times over. And I still feel anxious when I know I have to gear up for a tough conversation. With hundreds of these kinds of conversations under my belt, I assure you that it does get easier -- if you have a strategy in place.There are very few leaders who don't struggle with having to deliver bad news. Sometimes you're firing someone, others you're giving critical feedback. It's a tough part of the gig, but a crucial one if you want to be successful.
A dangerous leader is one that avoids confrontation altogether. They either make someone else do this part of the job, become passive-aggressive to the employee in lieu of directness, or cross their fingers and hope that the employee either improves or quits. Needless to say, these are all terrible attributes.If you love being in a leadership role but hate this part of the job, here are a few strategies that have helped me become more comfortable with confrontation.
1. Mapping it Out: Clear Foundations for the Conversation
Initiating a difficult conversation requires a strategic approach. Begin by mapping out the essential details — Who, What, Where, When, and How. This structured foundation ensures clarity for the employee and serves as a guide to keep the conversation on track, especially when faced with potential defensiveness or finger-pointing. A scripted approach can help maintain composure and direction during the dialogue.
Think of the 4 W's as this:
Who: The person you're speaking with, but more precisely, knowing how to talk to this specific person in a way that's constructive. Sometimes people like being approach with difficult conversations in vastly different ways. Does someone want the bad news ripped off like a bandaid? Does someone usually like things more empathetic? Speak to your audience.
What: Have the discussion you're going to have with this person prepared. Are they being terminated? Make sure you're providing them with the detail required. Are they being placed on a performance-improvement-plan (PIP)? Make sure you provide clear steps.
Where: Let them know where this difficult conversation is stemming from. Are they not hitting their goals? Is the company in a downturn that requires letting people go? You don't have to give the full picture, but a basic: "we no longer need you" may not be enough to let them person understand why a deeply impactful action is occurring to them.
When: Make sure they know when this decision will be effective. More than likely it will be immediate, so be sure to let them know the immediacy of this action and what it entails from there over the next several hours.
2. Practice Makes Perfect: Enhancing Preparedness through Rehearsal
The significance of practice cannot be overstated. Regularly rehearse the conversation, whether during daily commutes or dedicated private moments. Taking it a step further, consider recording yourself or engaging in practice sessions with a trusted friend or spouse. This proactive approach provides valuable insights into delivery style and areas for improvement, ultimately boosting confidence.
3. The Business Perspective: Embracing the Messenger Role
Shift the mindset to recognize that delivering difficult news is not a personal matter but a responsibility as a messenger for the organization. Leaders are accountable to stakeholders such as shareholders, customers, and staff, who prioritize a well-performing business and a healthy organizational culture over personal likability. Understanding this perspective helps leaders navigate tough conversations more effectively.
4. Getting Comfortable in the Uncomfortable: Acknowledging Discomfort
Accept and embrace the inherent discomfort that comes with delivering challenging messages. Physical reactions like shaky hands and sweating are natural responses. Leaders must push through these uncomfortable moments, understanding that they are temporary. This acknowledgment enables a more resilient and composed approach to the conversation.
5. Focus on the End Goal: Maintaining Perspective and Purpose
Despite the temporary discomfort, keeping the end goal in mind is crucial. Whether the conversation lasts minutes or hours, maintaining focus on the bigger picture is essential. The end goal could involve removing a toxic element for the betterment of the company, leading to improved performance, a positive organizational culture, and increased employee satisfaction. This perspective reinforces the leader's commitment to the greater good of the organization.
